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The Ghosts of my Childhood Past

ImageYes, I was young. But I was not foolish. With eyes that see everything, and an intuition that cuts sharper than any wind chakra coated blade, I was constantly putting myself at the front lines, absorbing information from all angles. Yes, I was curio. Only because I hated not knowing; being in the dark. But as a child you only have so much processing capability; there’s all this data coming in but you don’t know what to do with it. So it just sits there, waiting for you to either understand it, or forget it. And I don’t forget.

The data sat in that cauldron, mutating from time to time, but just as dormant. And then one day, you begin to see patterns. You find missing gaps; and you attempt to fill them. Instinctively, you dip your hands into that cauldron, despite screams from the dark matter to leave it alone. You don’t listen. You dive right in. And suddenly everything is clear.Clearer than ever. That crystallizing moment. When you discover all you saw, all you know, allyou had been told, isn’t what you had believed. Your very foundation of existence totally shaken to the core. No, this is not the rag being pulled from underneath you. This is the floor literally disappearing from where you’re standing. Then you begin to fall. Voices grow faint The light diminishes, getting farther and farther till it vanishes. Oh, the irony!

And you reach a point, where you’re not sure if your still falling. You’ve been there for so long you just don’t care. For the dark matter mutates one last time; bearing its final form. The immortal ghosts that will haunt you forever. They will be with you. Because you gave them life. Reminding you of what you have done; how cruel this world is, keeping you from growing forward; from opening that door. For you feel you have enough of them already. Oh, the truth is grizzly.

Some things are better off left unsaid. Even if it’s the truth. For the sake of sanity. And stability.

The 100% talk-do ratio theory

half empty half fullYep! Ok, I know it’s a little wordy but ”The 100% talk-do ratio theory’ is something I’ve put a lot of time into and I’m finally ready to let the world know what I think.

I believe people have what I’d like to call follow-up cups(for lack of a better term); containers that can be 100% full at all times and determine how we follow up what we say we’ll do. Now, this 100% is composed of either ‘talk’ percentage, or ‘do’ percentage; meaning that when one ‘component’ is high, the other is ‘low’. That is to say if someone has say 60% talk, he or she has 40% do. If it’s 75% do, there’s a chance it’s also 25% talk. Following?

From my observation, someone who keeps saying they’ll do something [for you] is less likely to do it; whereas someone who is quiet about something is more likely to do it sooner than you think. Why? Am not sure…so I came up with the 100% talk-do ratio theory. Surprises mostly come from the quietest in the group simply because they are probably 90% do and 10% talk. And the one’s that will be talking about doing it and how they’re going to do it probably spend more time telling people how they will get it done rather than just getting it done. And surprisingly people who are good with their mouths are rarely good with their hands (and maybe feet) and vice versa. Examples? Critics never do anything. Politicians that address people every week are the most idle. I know Messi is silent; it’s said that people thought he was dumb when he arrived at Barcelona, but yes, he talks with his feet. A whole lot.

Therefore, the next time someone promises you something, or work is allocated within a team, hopefully the 100% talk-do ratio theory will help you make an informed decision. Let me also add that no position on the talk-do continuum is bad; it all depends on what you do with it.

My two cents.

Populating the ghost town of Originality


First, let me start by saying this. No, this is NOT about China products…and to the Chinese, I love you all!

Anyway, just the other day, I was immersed in Relient K music (awesome band, really) when the lyrics of their song Wit’s All Been Done Before struck me hard for the first time. Originality IS becoming a ghost town. Everyone’s copying everyone; we’d rather flow with someone else’s style, or ideas or the like instead of being ourselves. And as the band says, ” …cause repetition’s just so safe; but repetition’s just like prison…”

The reason behind this, I don’t know; but it’s more evident than ever that the present day person is overly concerned of what society thinks of him and his ideas or ideals. We are so careful not to offend another’s view of something to the point that it inhibits us from realising our true potential. We are ‘scared’ of what will happen if we try to break off and start something new, especially with the 50% chance that it will outright fall flat on its (or our) faces. But what we keep forgetting is that most of our enjoyment today, rather ALL of our enjoyment today is because someone somewhere was bold enough to step forward amid harsh words and ridicule from peers in order to realise what they had pictured in mind.

I am one of the few that have decided to rip apart the veil of repetition. Let’s just say I’m not really into prison, but more seriously, the fish that mature are the one’s that go against the flow, right? We’re originals remember? Even twins don’t have the same fingerprint. I always say it wouldn’t hurt to try, and if it fails then I wouldn’t be less than I was; at worst I may have gained nothing from trying but I wouldn’t have lost anything either (win win? 😉 ).

All in all, I am pretty sure of this. If I just go out there and be truthful to myself, so long as I don’t screw up and keep my head above the water then something good will definitely happen. Of course it’s not easy. Picture this. A baby. Cute, huh? But what preceded the baby? Labour.

The reason why something is outstanding is because it stands out.  Frankly, if you’re not different, then I don’t think someone else would need you. So just be you!

Think about it..

*the picture of the cute little girl isn’t mine; its from another blog that has something deep on originality. It’s in Spanish,but it’ll blow your head off. You can click it and follow.

Mirror Mirror

With time I’ve noticed something really strange. It’s kind of impossible for an angry person to look into a mirror and not smile. Personally, I think it’s because we always want to be at our best and noticing a really stupid appearance in the mirror triggers a reflex action (smiling) that changes that appearance. But what if its something we can’t change? Weight, size, that obnoxious pimple that just can’t go away…..A feeling of frustration begins to rise, more often than not. Because we can’t immediately change it.

Funnily, because humans are constantly comparing themselves to each other (well, I’d say 95% of humans) , the people we compare ourselves to act as our ‘mirrors’. We are happy with our qualities; if we can see them in other happy people. Some people even change their behavior to match those they envy. You could call that an identity crisis but that’s for another day.

here’s the kicker. The next time you get frustrated, angry, or put off by someone’s behaviour, take a closer look at yourself. There’s a chance they might have reminded you of how you behave and you might be subconsciously defending yourself. Hard to believe, right? Think about it. I did; I used to complain about someone’s negative views to the work we were working on. But I realised that as I captained another team elsewhere, I did the same thing. So I’ll tell you again. Think about it.,

Capacity to compromise

Human beings are never alike. An ‘only use once blueprint’. With different likes, dislikes and temperaments. Therefore, the only reason people get along is compromise; the willingness of one to simply ignore the things he hates in another. And because we are different we have different ‘compromise containers’. Some have large containers that can stomach anything; they choose to love for the good things they see in others instead of disliking them for the bad. They are almost numb tothe occasional ‘toe stepping’.

On the other hand, others have quite small containers and pick out the awful stuff in the not so perfect human and use that to pin them down or push them away. The thing is, we will always find a mistake if we look for one; the same way we find good things. So basically, the capacity to compromise is a matter of choice; you can choose to forgive when temperaments clash or you can choose to be upset because the other is not ‘feeling’ you. Differences are here to stay; the choice to cope or to mope is entirely yours.

Fill your shoes? Thanks but I have mine

Ok, grab your chairs because this is gonna rock your world and turn it up side down..

I’m 19, almost, and during those years on earth I’ve noticed how people strive to follow in the footsteps of those ahead of them. That’s good. But you see, there’s a (very) thin line between following in someone’s footsteps and and outright ‘imitation.’ People tend to look like someone and say, “I’m gonna be just like him.” And then start doing stuff that their role model did, down to the nitty gritty and refuse to expand their line of thinking and explore different ways of doing stuff. They usually hide behind the curtain of  “i don’t remember him doing that” or “it can’t be that way because he didn’t do it that way.” And so without knowing it we limit ourselves to those ahead of us.

I had and still have people who I mentor and teach, and always encourage them to surpass me (keep trying guys!) because I see that that’s better for them. I believe it is every master’s  dream to see his students surpass his level and make his mark, not just be an exact copyright. I wouldn’t want go to a place and say my name and then people are like…??? ..and then they remember you by the name of your senior. I have a name. And at times I’d like to hear it being mentioned.

My point is, if you have a role model, get what he has, add yours and surpass him. Step out of his shadow, after all, a revolution starts when someone crosses the line. But this isnt a license for pride,..that is usually a threat in the face of success. I like Richard Branson’s style of doing stuff, but I won’t stop where he is. I’ll keep pushing until I surpass him. Actually, that’s healthy, that way you’ll never slack. Overtaking is allowed, right?

It’s good to follow  someone’s back. Really. But I think it’s better to see that back as the one you must jump over. Maybe you shoes are too small, so I must get my own.

Believe it, …But that’s just me.

Closer – by Inoue Joe

I been inspired by this song Closer by Inoue Joe. The real version is Japanese but here’s the transtation.

“You’ve got to be extra careful
with the things nearest to you
You know the closer you get to something
the tougher it is to see it

Explain to me this happiness
that you just got to experience.
Or maybe your so blessed
that you can’t even remember?
That you stand here now
That you live and breathe
They’re all little miracles
just by themselves

It’s fine to say “Never give up.”
and “Keep chasing your dreams.”
But the more time you spend talking big You know the closer you get to something
the tougher it is to see it
And I’ll never take it for granted
the less you get done.
I’ll press that handful of courage against my heart
and with its help, survive another day
And I’ll never take it for granted
Let’s go”

The fear of a genius

*If you can make this up, you’re good. May be confusing.


Alone. Dark. Cold. Silence. No life; no flora no fauna…just him. The pestering he loved was gone. So were those who needed help. And the heartbroken too. The world grew larger, or so he thought. And so he gathered the little strength he had and stood up. Started walking towards the faint light ahead.

He approaches. It leads to a dimly lit corridor. On the walls, posters. Banners. Graffiti tattooed all over with his name in context. For all the wrong reasons. “MIA”. “Buster”. “Liar”. “Cheat”. “Loser”. “Trash”. “Waste of space”.A god of his kind had been reduced to nought. With no explanation; no reason; no cause. He had become average. He walks down the Hall of Shame in disbelief..

He gets to a door. He opens it. Bright light stuns him. Headache. His eyes adjust. The world at large; more splendid than before; full of life and vigour..but he is sad. He’s right in the midst of the human traffic. But he’s invisible. No one sees him. Even they that badly needed him; that depended on him for survival…that bond was savoured. He gets slighty happy when a man knocks him and he and falls to the dirt. And when he gets up, he makes up the sign the man hung on his neck. “Free hugs”. He needed someone to realise him. Nil. He hates the world. His work is done. He figured it was time for him to die. That solitude. That feeling of being unwanted; invisible; “a waste of space” was unbearable. No one to care; no one to be cared for. No one to love, no one to be loved by. “Why am I here?” “If the world is already a better place, then what’s my purpose for living?” And he decides that he might be of use in the afterlife, for the world no longer needs him.

But he wakes up. From the nightmare. Sweating. His aching head feels twice the size. And so does his heart. Another chance to prove his worth. And so he goes forth, burning with the flame of youth, broad minded and open hearted. For he’s still scared…but he knows what he must do.

The price of being a genius


A chemical bond. The ionic one in particular; occurs when an atom loses electrons from its outer shell. When one is lost, the bond becomes twice as strong as it was before. And the resulting bond will require more energy to break than the previous one….but that’s not the point.

You see, people behave in almost the same way. When one bond with a loved one is lost, the existing ones increase in strength. Maybe two fold; maybe a hundred, but we cling to them far much more than before. Im not sure why; maybe the fear of losing another subconsciously pushes us to prevent another from breaking, even if at times it’s beyond our power. But that’s who we are, human; having an inner need to show others that we care, no matter how slight. In some its greater; these are the ones we refer to as being ‘protective.’ In others it may not even show, but it is there; yes, it will show at one point, when you least expect it. No one is fully bad, even 2% good can overcome 98% bad when its from the heart, the same way a candle can light a room in an instant.

And so I conclude that humans were made to love each other. Hate makes love stronger; loss makes love stronger.

Porcelain hearts, only the One who created them knows better.

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